持悲为徊

自嘲

本是后山人，偶坐前堂客。
醉舞经阁半卷书，坐井说天阔。
大志戏功名，海斗量福祸。
论到囊中羞涩时，怒指乾坤错。

      今天是我的生日！一般！
      历史上这一天都有什么呢？1913年10月9日武昌起义元勋蒋翊武被害；1941年10月9日第二次长沙战役结束；1980年10月9日中国高科技产业开始在中... ；1993年10月9日火焰山腹地发现千年干尸；1948年10月9日丘吉尔提出三环外交。
      纵观历史上的这一天，我发现我就是个倒霉蛋。啥事不好发生啥。唯一好的就是科技产业开始。注定我要在这个领域有所剑术。努力吧！

      中午吃饭遇到一个加塞的女傻屄，吃个饭也要遇到屄气横溢的事情，更可气的是这傻屄还生了两个孩子。真为这两个孩子感到悲哀，怎么就从这样的傻屄里面出来了，这孩子上辈子造了什么孽啊。如此的屄逼应该被搅屎棍杵死才对。危害社会，危害人类。如果我是神，我一定施个魔法把她变成婊子。任人宰割。
      于是，我决定，从今以后，我要挺起腰板，抬起胸膛，见到她就对着她大喉一声：傻屄～～～
      加塞的女傻屄！祝你在有生之年被人蹂躏到死！

      该忘记的记住了就是种痛苦，该记住的忘记了就会后悔。人活着总是这么累，这么现实，真想假惺惺点。起码没那么多杀死脑细胞的可能性，当你想做什么事情时候发现真的好难。虽然古人说过，万事开头难。可惜古人确不知道好多事情就压根开不了头，让你挣扎啊，挣扎啊。最后古人又来一句，知难而退。我就日了。这古人还都是一群棒槌啊。开个头，结个尾。中间让你受罪去。
      一缕青烟一冒，他又来一句，节哀顺变。怎么说他都他娘的有理。算了，说不过古人了。等好几万年以后，我们也是古人了，到时候的人都说不过我们。想气气他们都得以死为代价。悲哀的很。
      祝持持在今后的日子里，新的岗位上，大展宏图。古来兮哟！

  A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her .She did not know how she was going  to make it and wanted to give up.she was tired of fighting and strugging .It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

  Her mother took her to the kitchen .She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire.Soon the pots came to boil.In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil,without saying a word.

  In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners.She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl.

  She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

  Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a  bowl.

  Turning to her daughter,she asked,"tell me ,what do you see?"

  "Carrots,eggs,and coffee,"she replied. her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. she did and noted that they were soft.

  The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it .After pulling off the shell,she observed the hard-boiled egg.

  Finally,the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.

 The daughter then asked,"what does it mean, mother?"

  Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity.Boiling water.Each reacted differently.

  The carrot went in strong ,hard,and unrelenting.However,after being subjected to the boiling water ,it softened and became weak.

  The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior,but after sitting through the boiling water,its inside became hardened.

  The ground coffee beans were unique,however.After they were in the boiling water,they had changed the water.

"which are you?" she asked her daughter ."When adversity knocks on your door,how do you respond? Are you a carrot ,an egg or a coffee bean?"

  Think of this :which am i ?Am i the carrot that seems strong,but with pain and adversity do i wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

  Am i the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat?

  Did i have a fluid spirit,but after a death, a death,a breakup,a financial hardship or some other trial,have i become hardened and stiff?Does my shell look the same ,but on the inside am i bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

  Or am i like the coffee bean?

  The bean actually changes the hot water ,the very circumstance that brings the pain. when the water gets hot , it releases the fragrance and flavor.

  May you  have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong ,enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy . the happiest of people don`t  necessarily have the best of everything;they just make the most of everything  that comes along their way .

  The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can`t go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

  When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling.

   Live your life so at the end ,you`re the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying .

      恨自己,恨自己,恨自己~我只能恨自己,因为生活中的不开心与开心完全取决于自己.所以我恨自己,恨自己不开心,恨自己不争气,恨自己脆弱,恨自己坚强,恨自己虚伪,恨自己胆怯,恨自己.........

      真的喘不过气,我该怎么办?生活如此不快乐,却没有理由放弃自己.我为什么要出生?什么是父母的爱呢?什么是为人子女呢?

      好想哭,可为什么没有眼泪?心好痛,可为什么没有痛觉!

      你们有过心痛的感觉吗?胸口很闷,心跳放慢,一种委屈掺杂其中.觉得痛,一种心跳要停止的痛!

      我要怎么做呢?做父母的好孩子,做朋友的好伙伴,做......只不要做自己.我自己是怎样呢?该怎样呢?

      毕业了,工作有了,人生完成一大步,可为什么我还是如此愚蠢,如此累,如此伤心.

      好想解脱,想解脱,解脱父母的不理解,解脱父母的管教,解脱朋友的背叛,解脱不快乐的生活,我该怎么办?

      恨自己,恨自己不洒脱,恨自己不决绝,恨自己没勇气.如果我解脱了,父母怎么办?生命是父母给的,我有责任保护好自己让生命延续.~

      可我怎么办?活着好辛苦,没人理解!我不是一个轻浮的人,却因为爱放下自尊.我不是一个不听话的人,却因为性格被人误解,我不是不想做好一切,却因为因为搞乱了自己的生活,我从小固执,不善于沟通.把自己包在自己的世界里,每踏出一步时,都会带着伤返回.一次次踏出,一次次返回,现在的我遍体鳞伤.没有办法可以恢复,甚至连自救都没有了力气!

      这就是我,痛苦的活着.理解所有人,却难以了解自己.原谅所有人,却无法原谅自己.疼爱所有人,却恨透了自己!笑对所有人,却哭着面对自己.好恨这样的自己~

      我不知道怎样摆脱现状!是我的错我承认.我的性格中太多懦弱,太多伪装,太少沟通,太欠解释,太天真幼稚.太......

      好恨自己~好恨 好恨  好恨  好恨........

      PS：唯一的一次也是最后一次转载朋友的文章。希望这位朋友不会介意，如果侵犯版权我随时删掉！

      掏心窝子也要看对谁，不要只是为了配合氛围。对方如果缺抚慰又听话的，如痴如醉就很容易出轨。其实长相不用太美，待在一起才不会太累。无论身上什么部位，是脸是腿，都代替不了思维。这么多年不知爱为何物。别看身边总有女人无数，可是每段感情都禁不住相处，可笑又可恶，我的人生观是满不在乎。我的座右铭是难得糊涂，与其浪费时间去辩解或诉苦，还不如看猫和老鼠 。

      最近忙什么呢？什么时候结婚？谈对象了吗？见到一个人基本都是这三句话现在。听着相当无奈，就象当年说吃了吗？考试多少分？周末休息不？一样。面对这样的问题现在基本就一句话：有谈，有谈。回答大部分也一样：哦！
      恨不得过去踹丫一脚！结婚时候告诉你，你不就都知道了嘛！掏钱就行了！发财了也给你随理！奶奶个熊的，咬牙切齿的无奈！这社会太疯狂了！
      若干年以后呢？生孩子了吗？孩子多大了？你看我象能生出来的？问我老婆去！谢谢，我忙着挣奶粉钱呢！没空闲聊！孩子没奶了你负责呢？

       崩溃的我，崩溃的人类！

在老姐博客上发现的一首好歌，给人感觉犹如站在浪尖上的自由和豪迈。

Never Know －－Jack Johnson

I hear this old story before
If people keep appealing for the metaphors
Don't leave much up to the imagination,
So I, wanna give this imagery back
No it just aint so easy like that
so, I turn the page and read the story again
and again and again
It just seems the same, with a diff. name
We're breaking every building
and we're growing
always guessing

Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
we're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Were trying but where is this all leading
Never Know

It all happened so much faster
than you could say disaster
Wanna take a time lapse
and look at it backwards
From the last one
and maybe thats just the answer
that we're after
but after all
we're just a bubble in a boiling pot
just one breath in a chain of thought
the moments just combusting
feel certain but we'll never never know
just seems the same
give it a diff. name
We're beggin and we're needing
and we're trying and we're breathing

Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
we're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Helping, we're builign
and we're growing
Never Know

Knock knock on the door to door
tell ya that the metaphor is better than yours
and you can either sink or swim
things are looking pretty grim
If you dont believe in what this one feeding
Its got no feeling
So I read it again
and again and again
Just seems the same
too many different names
our hearts are strong our hands are weak
We'll always be competing never knowing

Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
we're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
But the truth is
all we got is questions
We'll Never Know
Never Know
Never Know

      不要再说永远，不要再说！因为永远不是属于你个人的，它的存在必然会和另一个人，另一个事情有着不可逾越的联系。就想朗朗乾坤一样，都是注定的。永远对于你我来说，都太过于沉重。还是让它自然随性些吧。也许结果会豁然开朗起来。
      不多说了，想想这些也怪累的。Happy 一下！

      闲里偷忙了N多天，感触颇深。其中最大的感触就是GV的无能，软弱，没有全局观。必然会导致整个事态的无可挽回。不是什么人都有那样的能力，为什么眼睛都长在屁股上了。难道坐在屁股地下的眼睛不会被屁熏到，挤到吗？？ 问问你们自己吧！为你们感到可悲，同时为你们感到遗憾和恐惧。难道你们从始至终都没有意识到吗？？私欲的膨胀，让你们已经丧失理智。我开始怀疑还有必要为我所想的奋斗吗？？

      我只有为你们祈祷了！一群思想的残废！！！残废！！

      最近工作时候总懒得下楼吃饭，于是乎和方便面结下不解之缘。虽然知道是垃圾食物，但想想能够如此迅速的解决温饱问题，还是咬牙吃掉了。不过光有方便面是不是显得太单调了？？要是能有个美女也装在口袋里，随时拿出来泡一包。哎～～这不就是“泡妞”吗？难道泡妞是这么出来的？
      另外，方便面吃多了容易中毒，因为防腐剂太多。不过死后如果没钱火化的时候，你的尸体可以保存N久，绝对不腐烂。从这个角度来说还是有这长远意义的。
      这个又如尿崩一样，哗哗的就出来了！乐～～

      看上去很有理？女人在我们还未懂事的时候教会了我们如何脱去衣服，如何光着身子洗澡，以及和女人一起睡觉，吃饭。再随后的日子里我们有着些许的机会去脱去自己心爱女人的衣服，但多数却被指责，被唉声叹气声说淹没。其实这些都是因果关系，追溯到母系时代这个问题更为突出。但现在怎么就成了这样呢？？
      看上去很没理！

zhiliao的问题：在财力一般的情况下，哪种投资方式比较好？

合资控股，钱生钱。

MRAZ的问题：在环境日益恶化的未来，生孩子是给孩子更多的快乐，还是更多的恐怖？